I was unworthy. She deserved him, and I didn’t. She had a beautiful soul, and I was anything but pure. I was nothing but tainted. I was too flawed to be of anyone’s definition of perfection. I didn’t deserve the potential of his love - the capability to give me exactly what I need and want. But she deserved it and had it. She had the man that I was waiting for; she had what any other radiant woman would have. I thought that when she left him, it was a sign that maybe…just maybe, he was meant for me. That I, too, might deserve what other genuine souls have.
And how wrong I was about that. I wasn’t strong enough; I had nothing to offer. All I had was a love that I couldn’t control - a love that made me weak in every corner, yet strong in so many other ways. For the first time in my life, I thought that I was breathing for once. I saw the world as such a better place, and I thought that he and I could finally enjoy our passions together.
I had never felt a hand that fitted mine so perfectly, a mind that synchronized with this peculiar heart of mine. We were gazing in the same direction and had parts that complemented each other. I had died everyday, hoping to meet someone like him. And who would have thought that after I met him, I could no longer die but to dissolve into nothingness - into the air that was too unworthy to be inhaled by any man of such character. All because I was nothing but a fragile woman who had a love that only a man would give to a woman of his desire."